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There was once a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he would lose his temper, he should hammer a nail into a wooden board.
As the boy learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered gradually dwindled down. He discovered that it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the board.
Finally, the day came when the boy did not lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy should now pull out the nails from the board. The father then told his son to look at the holes in the board, that the board would never look the same again.
The board is a metaphor to our heart. When one says or does things in anger, whether in the workplace or at home, it leaves scars in the heart. No matter how many times one apologises, the heart will never stay the same. The wounds will heal but the scars will remain.
The next time you are angry at your subordinates or work colleagues and are about to say something hurtful, ask yourself first if there is a way to say it in a tactful manner. Impulsive actions have ruined relationships a number of times.
If someone uses harsh words on you, walk away without reacting, if at all possible. Forgiveness is liberating. Do not carry grudges in your heart. The burden can immobilise your journey to greatness.
Decisions are made on a daily basis and you always have a choice. Either you fill the holes in the hearts of your staff or colleagues with compassion, caring words and actions, or use cruel words to intimidate and destroy them. However, it would still be better if you strive to understand your employees' unique personalities and working styles, mentor them if you can, and encourage them to improve and explore.
• Do not be very easily offended when it is unnecessary
• Control your temper as it will lead to more harm than good
• Always find a way to say things you want in a tactful manner
Find out what skills you need to succeed?
Source: Kamran Ahmed Siddiqui, Special to Jobs & Careers
The writer is Training Manager in a major Abu Dhabi Oil & Gas Company